Others say, the more you care about someone, the stronger your feelings will be towards that person; be it happiness, sadness or disappointment.
I finally understood what it actually meant.
Cos we did this to one and other. and we were all hurt by what we did.
I'm thankful for all that has happened today.
First.
To Steph, thank you for the crazy walk around NP to settle my timetable.
Second.
To Mrs. Doris Tan (of MDE), thank you for clearing those doubts.
Third.
To Mr. Yong KS (of MDE), thank you for allowing the swap.
Fourth.
To Ms. Wong WH (of MDE), thank you for going through all the trouble to answer my questions, clear my doubts, going the extra mile to send the email and help me get my DPP. You are truly a class advisor.
Fifth.
To the 'i-really-dno-her-name' lady (from the School of IS's office), thank you for trying to be patient in understanding my problem and refering me to your other colleague.
Sixth.
To the 'i-really-dno-his-name' guy (from the School of IS's office), thank you for being so understanding and patient to listen to what I have to say and trying your best to help me out.
Seventh.
To Lingli, thank you for accompanying me to get that heavy newspaper and the bus ride to where I had to leave you.
Eighth.
To John (from NHSC), thank you for dragging me right back to NH. If it wasn't for you, the things mentioned below wouldn't have happened.
Ninth.
To my lovely friends, thank you for brightening up my 4-hr break with all the FB spamming.
Lastly.
To my adoptive mummy, thank you for the acknowledgement.
Gawd. If only this was everyday.
I consider myself lucky, got the chance to accompany my grandmother on her wet-market trip and to learn that awesome awesome dish.
I hope it'll be successful.
A busy day tomorrow.
It was an anniversary to be remembered. The surprise was nearly ruined by the old man himself. Nevertheless, things went out fine. A great way to end a beautiful day.
- October 10th, 2009
All human beings seem to have a problem, be it a male or a female; a toddler or an elderly. It is that they will always be discontented with whatever they own or have; in other words, we always ask for nothing, but more, more than what we each can possibly take. For the past 7 weeks, I stumbled upon a true story.
And this was what the girl had so very much wanted to say to her mama then… …
Dear Mama
Sometimes there are just so many things that I don’t understand. But I do know one thing for sure, that is Mama works hard for the family, while Papa provides money. Mama’s poor hands are old and wrinkled, from the many years of household chores. Mama has to look after the younger children at home, Mama is really busy.
The comment on folding the clothes was merely meant to as a suggestion, a suggestion to ease and simplify the many ways to fold clothes. If things were standardized, jobs would be much easier and taking less time to complete. Shouldn’t that be a good thing? However, the heartfelt words were taken as a form or condemn. These innocent sentences were made to sound hurtful and mean to the latter.
I had wanted Mama to spend some time with me during my holidays, but the younger children have taken Mama away from me. I understand that Mama is very needed by the younger children, so I don’t complain and wait for my turn. While I can see that Mama is busy, I try to help and be a nice kid.
Many say that I am a really good child; some say I’m sensible, helpful, while others say I’m caring and understanding. But Mama doesn’t think so. I will have to agree that I do not bother to wake up early, and that I like to spend time with the internet. I don’t see why I have to get up early, after all, it’s the holidays and there is nothing much to do.
I did work a bit of part time to earn a little pocket money, and when I don’t have enough to go by; I’ll just have to bit my own tongue. When I have extra money, they are used to buy some food for the family. I do try to do some housework, and I do what I do best – that is to clean the floor. But Mama complains that I do it in the evening.
I don’t like folding the clothes, so I do really little of it, once or twice during the holidays. And I get blamed for not helping with something I don’t like to do. I do wash the dishes on my own accord; I should say this is one of those rare times where I actually help with dishes more than just once or twice. I’ve been washing dishes quite a lot, much more than the previous holidays. I should say I have improved by quite a handful, but Mama says that I haven’t been unwilling in doing so.
Mama complains that I don’t shower the dog often, and now Mama wants me to do so twice a week. Mama is angry that I don’t bother about the dog. But I am the one who initiates and decides to budge Papa when to bring the dog for walks. I can’t handle the dog alone, when he’s outside – he gets really crazy. And now it’s my fault that the dog stinky or unhygienic. All these while, the dog used to be Papa’s job, ever since I’ve started showering for that very one time; it has now become my responsibility. I try not to complain, because I love my dog.
Mama says I do not help around the house. Mama says I know nothing to help around the house. I had wanted to volunteer to do some cooking and ironing. But Mama says that I can only wreck the kitchen and waste more electricity if I were to iron the clothes.
Mama says I do not contribute to the household. But I do. I really do. I come up with suggestions and decisions to help Mama decide where to go, how to plan her time, what to cook, what to do and what not. I do try to help Mama mentally. Look at what it for lunch today, didn’t I help to second and support Mama’s idea?
Sometimes I go the extra mile to fetch the younger children to tuition and back. And even, look after my kid cousin. The entire September holiday was dedicated to the kid cousin, because Mama had no time to look after him, in view of the younger children’s national exams.
Mama, I wished we could stop all these. I understand that Mama is very stressed up over the national exams. But try to calm down and take things easy, one at a time. We haven’t fought in a long while; we don’t need this again, because I love you, like the way you love me.
Love
Your daughter
what's the use of being the good girl when it all comes back to zero?
i'm feel so bad when i ignore mummy. i don't bother to clean the house, send her to the door, or whatever. it's just that the daily routine has been washed away (for now).
and when i want to try to make it up or break the ice by talking to her, she pushes me away. it drives me nuts really.
i want to stay away from all these rubbish. but daddy told me to just hang in there.
eh, hello? my good intentions were trashed and now i'm put up in a situation.
you call this family crisis?
dang it.
It was a purely innocent comment. I just said what I felt, which was purely harmless and there was definitely no personal attacks involved.
The comment was read in a wrong way, however, was made to seem like some fault-finding issue. Surely the suggestion, to standardize how clothes are being folded, should be a good thing, for now trouble can be minimized, effort is now easier and time taken to get the job done can be reduced, right?
No, no. It was not read this way. The comment was taken personally, and a cold war has just broke out.
Chill babe, now you need more time to get the air cleared.
I woke up at 9 (with only 8 hours of sleep since the day before). We left house at 9.30 to have breakfast with grandpa and gujie’s family. My little cousin was very siangmeng that morning, and there was a tinge of upcoming tantrum, luckily gujie had it all under control.
We went to visit grandma at the columbarium. The place is still under construction but it’s almost as good as a 5-star hotel. I mean the environment was as good as that of a library, except for the fact that there aren’t any computer terminals or book loaning stations. Sofas, coffee tables, carpets and water dispensing units were located abundantly.
It kinda came back to square one, once we saw grandma’s photo. Teary eyes and slight sobbing were all in the package. I had no idea why I wasn’t crying or anything.
My thoughts went back to the final month of my grandma’s life. I pictured all that happened in the final month; the endless hospital visits right after school, the drowsy days caused by morphine, loss of appetite, the late taxi nights and all. It was all sad. Then it came to the final day. I was not there in the morning, but I went to the hospital in the afternoon (once I was done with my council camp meeting). Time drew nearer to the point of death. In any case I was still carrying the torch of hope that my grandma would be able to sit upright and be with us once she was being sent back home. I was not there at that point when my grandma drew her last breath. I remembered arriving just 2 or 3 minutes later, with my sisters and my cousin. And then, it all went past like a dream. The wake, the funeral, the 49days of vegetarian diet and chanting, the weekly scriptural readings for 7weeks running and having lunch and dinner together as a family, made the family stronger than ever. We were bonded even more through my grandma’s passing and we understood the true meaning of unity. Now the main focus of the family is grandpa, he’s of the most importance and the family is making sure that he does not go right back to his emotional stupor.
We stayed around for about one hour or so, and I got home to help with some housework before heading out with daddy and erjie.
The highlight of the father-and-daughter trip was that I was mistaken as my dad’s girlfriend. So there were actually three possibilities.
Number one, I must be looking so much older than I really am, if so, it’s time I have to start doing facials or wear more sesame street tees.
Number two, dad’s the young one, and he’ll have to start dressing more like a man of his age.
Lastly (like what daddy had said) the guy, who mistook our identities, has something stuck (real bad) to his eyes. Mum was hysterical when she heard about this.
We had dinner over at grandpa’s and the night ended with mooncakes and a round of fire sparklers.
I attended the magazine meeting in the morning. The results of the meeting proved to be a good one, since the template and (almost) the entire layout of the magazine has somewhat been confirmed. The meeting ended promptly at 12noon, and I headed straight down to work.
Work was tiring, but it was awfully fun. Filling up empty containers and labelling the mini sample tubs, plus, a chance to try out a mask! Dinner was at about 5 in the evening with my two lovely bosses, after which I headed down to SingPost to send some registered mail. Finished work at 6 and headed right down to NH to meet my dear little friends and their mums. 8 kids (with 1 more on the way) was much fun. It has been long since I’ve played with younger children. They have so much energy and enthusiasm to run all over the place. It was a really nice and the standard experience for every mid-autumn was that I am acknowledged as ‘the daughter’ for the 3 hours (or so) in NH. And to end it all, I (finally) got a cab ride to the MRT. This was when I realised that it has been a long time since I’ve taken a cab with her. Ha.
I got home at about 11, which was the latest time in the past year or so. I amazed myself with my liking towards young children that day and I hope to get another chance to do this again soon.
