under-estimated

Monday, 3 November 2008

我们完成了嫲嫲的心愿：
嫲嫲昨天在家中安详地走了。

it was painful to know that grandma has passed on. my legs nearly jellied when i heard that grandma just passed away. it was really sudden. grandma took her last breath just some 30mins after she was sent back home via the ambulance. daddy, shenshen, shushu and grandpa saw that grandma died in the presence of the Buddha. somehow we thought that the Buddha led grandma and made her move on.

we chanted for 12 hours straight from the point grandma passed on. this chanting was to aid her in return to the ji le world, where all Buddhist devotees should go after they die.

as of now, 我相信嫲嫲已经成佛，到了另一个没痛苦，没悲伤的世界。
crying and calling out her name or 'talking' to grandma would only make her hesitate about really leaving us and moving on.

it's hard not to tear when i reminisce about those times i've spent with her during her healthy days. grandma's such a great person. i should be celebrating the quality life that she always had - filial children and spouses and the amazing grandchildren. life's gonna be really different without her around.

grandma wants to see her grandchildren graduate with a uni cert. i remembered her mentioning about this before her heavy dosage of morphine at the hospital.

and i promised her, i will.

if she knows i'm still blogging at this hour, i think she won't let me off. she would probably be asking me to sleep early and get more rest.


i seriously think grandma's watching over me and the rest of the family.

amitabha.

thanks eileen, jazz and alfred.

by makk at 1:25 am |